Monday, November 24, 2008

Last Column ko...........SANA

Snapping out… Killing the drama…

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“When a man journeys toward his destiny, often he is obliged to change paths. At other times , the forces around him are too powerful and he is compelled to lay aside his courage and yield…”— The Fifth Mountain, Paulo Coelho.
Everybody experiences misery a moment in his life. As for me, I am in such a desolation. Do not expect me to narrate everything because it is about man attaining Personal Legends and facing unavoidable circumstances that block his way to success. My decision was the turning point of my life and I chose the difficult path, which consequences are yet to be experienced.
“So little time, / try to understand /that I’m trying to make a move just to stay in the game, /I try to stay awake and remember my name /but everybody’s changing and I don’t feel the same.”—Everybody’s Changing, Keane
I believed that change is inevitable; one must deal with it or die. It is a cliché that nothing is permanent except change itself. The hard thing about dealing with change is that most of the time, it comes unexpected. Change has always approached us like an untimely guest, one that comes when we want that everything in the current state would be permanent. When we think that all is perfect and how we wish that nothing would go wrong, that is when change starts its entrance and ruin the facade of perfection. Though we already know that the whole thing is temporary, we try to keep them intact. We adjust; we try to cope with the change while preserving what seems to be apt to us, keeping what we want to cherish the most only to end up realizing that it’s not the same ─ and will never be the same.
“In the end I guess I had to fall. / Always find my place among the ashes. /
I can't hold on to me, /Wonder what's wrong with me.” — Lithium, Evanescence.
It is me; the one who always have a positive outlook in life, the one who encourages. I had lived the reputation of someone who, even in the midst of the most desperate situations, simply smiles without overconfidence or resignation. But it seems that pressure of circumstances prevailed and gained control. Change took its toll on me and so I say, I am suffering this grief right now… my soul is trampled… dreams are scrapped… it seems that I already forgot the meaning of forever…
Sudden implosion of silenced emotions /buried beneath a scarred heart for too long. /Delusions of hope fading away, /dying like leaves on frozen soil — My Apocalypse, Arch Enemy
I am writing my second and last column, it’s been a while since I joined the publication. The last three years taught me a lot of things and to start my life all over again, I will still choose to be the jerk who entered the school pub out of scratch. I want to extend my gratitude to our advisers, Ma’am Espina and Sir Tabo Tabo, who had been our parents in the office. To my senior editors who never ceased to believe in us, wherever you are, I owe you one. Conrad, Hector, Rex and all my other colleagues, it was an awesome team; let’s meet up someday and drink coffee. And speaking of coffee, thanks to the raccoon who taught me to drink coffee (peace man!). Lastly, I would like to give glory to the last three entities that had been my inspiration to write: the Almighty one who will always challenge and guide me to thy path, to my mother who had shed her sweat, blood and tears, and to the one I will refer to as ‘Nameless’ who had crushed me yet loved me with all her heart. I know she is out there somewhere, rediscovering things… I’ll be waiting for you forever…
Surely, I’ll miss writing… Hey, I’m hungry… Itadakimasu!
Break Operation…