Kaldereta, Speech at Contentment

Note: This blog post is inspired by a dish (cooked by me), a graduation speech and thoughts that never left my tiny brain.

“Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for.”
- Epicurus

Masaya lang ako. Masaya ako dahil sa maraming bagay. Dahil sa alam kong kaya akong patawarin ng mga tao kahit paulit-ulit akong magkamali. Dahil naniniwala na ulit ako sa tadhana. Dahil kay Lourd De Veyra na naghatid ng mahusay na graduation speech sa UP Masscom. Dahil kalderetang baka ang ulam at masarap ito (at ako talaga ang nagluto).

Kuntento. Contentment. Sabi sa dictionary:

Content

adj
1.	mentally or emotionally satisfied with things as they are
2.	assenting to or willing to accept circumstances, a proposed course of action, etc

Naisipan ko magluto ng kaldereta ngayon. Akala ko kasi dadating 'yung pinsan ko. 'Yung paborito kong pinsan. At dahil ang mga pinsan ang unang "bestfriend" natin, gusto ko masarap ang ulam niya. 

Bumili ako ng tomato paste, naisip ko masarap pag may carrots kaya bumili ako, naisip ko rin na wala pala akong bellpeper na nabili, bili ako. Magsisimula na sana ako maghiwa ng kung anu-ano nang maisip ko na wala akong keso. Oo, lumabas ako at bumili. Saka ko lang napagtanto na wala akong liver spread. Sais pesos na lang ang nasa kamay ko at nagaalangan na kong makakahanap pa ko ng pangdagdag. Pero hindi ako sumuko. Nilikom ko lahat ng mamisong nagkalat sa sala namin at sa wakas, nakaipon ako ng 18php. Duda akong sapat na iyon pero lumakad na ko. 20php ang isa at kahit nakakahiya, inutang ko na muna ung dos. Kailangan ko pa magluto kaya ndi na 'ko nagatubili. Pumayag naman ung nagbabantay eh.

Natapos ako magluto, saka ko nalaman na hindi na pupunta ang pinsan ko. Ansaya 'di ba. Oo nga pala, hanggang ngayon may utang pa rin akong dos sa tindahan.

Syempre badtrip ako, bakit pa ko nagluto? Kaso dumating ang tatay ko, kumain. Pagkatapos ng 3 araw naming cold war, kumain siya at sinaid ang sinandok na ulam. Nakatingin ako habang ansarap ng kain niya. (Mayabang ako. Blog ko 'to, bakit... 'Dun ka magyabang sa blog mo...)

Dun lang ako nakuntento. Oo nakuntento ako pagkatapos ng isang buwan at labingpitong araw. Bakit? Nakitaan ko ng pagtanggap ang tatay ko... 'Yung tao na akala ko bato...At bakit ako nakuntento??? Simple lang, nakabalik na ako sa dati kong sarili. Ang pokus, naibalik na sa dati nitong kinalalagyan.

Tinamaan ako kay Epicurus. Ang mga bagay na mayroon ako ngayon ay ang mga bagay na hinangad ko noon. Na kung hindi kaya, huwag ng magasam pa ng iba.

Minsan daw nagtanong ang estudyanteng henyo sa gurong henyo, si Plato kay Socrates:

Plato asked Socrates:"What is happiness?"
Socrates said:" I ask you to across the field and pick a flowers which is the most beautiful, but there is a rule that you can't go back and you can pick only one."
So Plato began to do this. After long time, he came back and held the most beautiful flower.
Socrates asked him:"Is this the most beautiful flower?"
Plato said:"When I crossed the field, I saw this beautiful flower and I picked it up and recognizing that it is the most beautiful one, while I saw many other beautiful flowers later, but I still insist on this one is the most beautiful one so I took it back."

Kuntento. Para sa'ken, kuntento lang ako hangga't kaya kong manatiling nakapokus. Habang umiindak sa sayaw ng buhay at nakikinig sa tugtog na tinatawag nilang tadhana. Madalas kasi, sabi nga ni Lourd, nakakalimutan natin ang orihinal na pakay natin... Andaming nakakapukaw ng atensyon natin at sa sobrang dami ng gusto natin, nawawala talaga kung ano talaga ang gusto natin. Ang masaklap pa, pag naalala na natin 'yung original plan, huli na ang lahat.

Sabi nga sa isang parte ng speech ni pareng Lourd na kinuha sa isang tula:

Nasalpok ko tuloy,nasalpok ng isang paa,
ang isang tambak ng
taeng-kalabaw sa daan:
paglakad sa lansangan,
nakatingin sa bituin.

Santambak na kumalat
sa kalsada’t paa ko,
paalala ng lupa
na paa’y nakatapak
paglakad sa lansangan,
nakatingin sa bituin.

Madami rin akong gusto. Pero sa ngayon, isa lang ang gusto ko. Maibalik ang tiwala ng mga taong TOTOONG naniniwala sa akin. 'Yung mga taong handang tanggapin ako, anumang kasalanan at kamalian ang gawin ko. Tadhana, nagluto ako para sa pinsan ko, dumating ang tatay ko at nagustuhan ang niluto ko. Kung hindi ako nagluto, hindi ako makukuntento (kahit na ilang beses ako lumabas para bumili ng kung anu-ano).

Kuntento na sana ako pero bilang panapos, dahil gaya-gaya ako, isang tula rin ang ibabahagi ko. Isa sa mga unang tula na inintindi ko at nagmulat sa aking mga mata. 

"Ang Guryon"

ni Ildefonso Santos
 

Tanggapin mo, anak, itong munting guryon

na yari sa patpat at papel de Hapon;

magandang laruang pula, puti, asul,

na may pangalan mong sa gitna naroon.

Ang hiling ko lamang, bago paliparin

ang guryon mong ito ay pakatimbangin;

ang solo't paulo'y sukating magaling

nang hindi mag-ikit o kaya'y magkiling.
 

Saka pag sumimoy ang hangin , ilabas

at sa papawiri'y bayaang lumipad;

datapwa't ang pisi'y tibayan mo, anak,

at baka lagutin ng hanging malakas.
 

Ibigin mo't hindi, balang araw ikaw

ay mapapabuyong makipagdagitan;

makipaglaban ka, subali't tandaan

na ang nagwawagi'y ang pusong marangal.
 

At kung ang guryon mo'y sakaling madaig,

matangay ng iba o kaya'y mapatid;

kung saka-sakaling di na mapabalik,

maawaing kamay nawa ang magkamit!
 

Ang buhay ay guryon: marupok, malikot,

dagiti't dumagit, saanman sumuot...

O, paliparin mo't ihalik sa Diyos,

bago pa tuluyang sa lupa'y sumubsob!


Ito na ata ang pinakamahabang blog post ko... At kung hindi ka nag-enjoy sa pagbasa nito, sumayaw ka na lang..:D

The wind creates the Rift

I've got to breathe, 

you can't take that from me 

'Cause it's all that you left that's mine  

You had to leave and that's all I can see 

But you told me your love was blind

 
I know there are times you're so impossible  

That I should sign a waiver  

And you will find someone worth walking on  

When you ask me to go 

 
I'll leave when the wind blows  

Take a breath and away it goes 

I'll be outside of your window 

I'll pass by but I'll go slow  

I'll leave when the wind blows

 
There was a day you threw our love away  

Then you passed it to someone new  

You wanna stay but since you wanna play  

We can finally say we're through

 
I know there are times you're so impossible  

And you ask me to go

 
I'll leave when the wind blows 

Take a breath and away it goes 

I'll be outside of your window 

'll pass by but I'll go slow 
I'll leave when the wind blows  

You can scream there's just echoes 

I''ll pass outside of your window  

You'll be sad that you let me go  

I'll leave but just know
 

As I lay in solitude, oh what's a boy supposed to do?  

I shake the very thought of you, me together 

I remember Late nights when I stayed up late all I do is wait and wait  

You're never coming home to me, that's the hardest thing to see
 

I've got to breathe, you can't take that from me  

I can finally say we're through
 

I'll leave when the wind blows  

Take a breath and away it goes  

I'll be outside of your window 

I'll pass by but I'll go slow
I'll leave when the wind blows 

You can scream there's just echoes  

I'll pass outside of your window 

You'll be sad that you let me go  

On every face you'll ever know 

And everywhere you'll ever go  

You'll feel when the wind blows

Here goes nothing

If today's the day I die
Lay me down under the lights
Let me fall in love
Let me save a life

And let me lose my voice
Singing all my favorite songs
Let me stare up at the stars
'Cause it's where we all belong

My heart like a firework in my chest
My only regret is having regrets
Travelled the world
I loved every step

And all I know is:
No one, no one lives forever
We will be remembered
For what we do right now

And baby I'm living louder
And dreaming longer, tonight
(We're living louder, we're living louder)
And baby I'm fighting harder
And loving stronger tonight
(We're loving stronger, we're loving stronger)

'Cause we're all just kids
Who grew up way too fast
Yeah the good die young
But the great will always last
We're growing older
But we're all soldiers tonight

If today's the day I go
Gonna drink with all my friends
Gonna laugh until we cry
As we talk and reminisce

And let me kiss a stranger
And rob the local bank
Let me become real rich
So I can give it all away

'Cause no one, no one lives forever
But we will be remembered
For what we do right now

And baby I'm living louder
And dreaming longer, tonight
(We're living louder, we're living louder)
And baby I'm fighting harder
And loving stronger tonight
(We're loving stronger, we're loving stronger)

'Cause we're all just kids
Who grew up way too fast
Yeah the good die young
But the great will always last

We're growing older
But we're all soldiers tonight

When you've got your breath inside your head
Every day's a second chance
If I wake up with a beating heart
Will I stand or will I fall?

I'm living louder
Dreaming longer tonight
Baby I'm fighting harder
And loving stronger tonight

And baby I'm living louder
And dreaming longer tonight
(We're living louder, we're living louder)
And baby I'm fighting harder
And loving stronger tonight
(We're loving stronger, we're loving stronger)

'Cause we're all just kids
Who grew up way too fast
Yeah the good die young
But the great will always last
We're growing older
But we're all soldiers tonight




Its morphin time! :)
Lets morphin! :)

Its time for special buster! :)

Omens

The cat just broke out of the chain...

Omens, how I love seeing 'em...

When would the bike give up, I wonder...

Tamad magpost si Dyeypee eh...:(

I know you think that I shouldn't still love you,
Or tell you that.
But if I didn't say it, well I'd still have felt it
where's the sense in that?

I promise I'm not trying to make your life harder
Or return to where we were

I will go down with this ship
And I won't put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white flag above my door
I'm in love and always will be

I know I left too much mess and
destruction to come back again
And I caused nothing but trouble
I understand if you can't talk to me again
And if you live by the rules of "it's over"
then I'm sure that that makes sense

I will go down with this ship
And I won't put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white flag above my door
I'm in love and always will be

And when we meet
Which I'm sure we will
All that was there
Will be there still
I'll let it pass
And hold my tongue
And you will think
That I've moved on....

I will go down with this ship
And I won't put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white flag above my door
I'm in love and always will be

I will go down with this ship
And I won't put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white flag above my door
I'm in love and always will be

I will go down with this ship
And I won't put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white flag above my door
I'm in love and always will be 

I can't say anything yet so ito na lang muna...